And then everything changed

Donnerstag, 24. November 2016

What I learned after re-watching Game of Thrones

I know, I know, I'm posting a lot about Game of Thrones, but it is the greatest still running show, in my opinion. This might be the last Game of Thrones themed post in a while though because unfortunately the next season is still a long wait away. Which is why I decided to re-watch the entire series over the last couple of months. The second time around there weren't any suprise moments left, of course, but on another level I enjoyed the show even more this time, because I understood and appreciated charaters and plotlines which previously couldn't catch my attention. Here's my experience:

I still love the characters I loved before

My taste didn't change so much, that I didn't swoon over The Young Wolf Robb Stark or over season 4 Jon Snow, or over Jaime Lannister in general. I am still rooting for Sansa Stark and enjoying Tyrion's wisdom and wit. I am still interested in Theon's story and still have a weird attraction for Ramsey.

I still hate the characters I hated before

The great thing about re-watching a show, is that this time I can skip over all the story lines I don't care about, namely pretty much the entire story of Danaerys Targaryen. I don't know what it is about her (it might just be the actress) but I just can't stand watching her without being annoyed. I also think that her story so far was quite repetetive. Unfortunately from season 5 on, she has scenes together with Tyrion as well as later with Theon and Yara Greyjoy, so I missed some of their scenes, too, and man, I missed Tyrion.

Other story lines I skipped (though I don't nessecarily dislike the characters) are Bran in season 4 and Arya's entire Bravos story line which is nerve recking.

Some characters I hate a little less now

Near the top of my hate list was also Melisandre. I'm still no big fan of her (I mean, come on, the things she does are really messed up) but I can appreciate her a bit more now. In the end, she is an extremely powerful witch. She definitely killed Renley, and she might have caused Robb's and Joffrey's deaths, too. Also, she is able to bring someone back from the dead which is incredible. I don't like Melissandre, but I do think that you shouldn't mess with her.

Some characters I appreciate a lot more now

The second time I watched Game of Thrones I found that I enjoyed so much the smart characters, who are not as remarkable as the main acts but are actually pulling the strings in the background. There is Tywin Lannister who, despite his evilness, actually knew what he was doing and made his family strong. There is Varys who knows everything about everyone. The fascinating thing about Varys is that (though he is manipulating) he actually just wants the best for the country. He saved Tyrion in season 4 because he believes that he is the only one who still genuinely wants to make everything better and who is able to do so (which is absolutely right - Go Tyrion!).

But the character I admired most for his wisdom and control over the situation while re-watching Game of Thrones is definitely Littlefinger. The more I pay attention to him, the more I realize that Littlefinger is absolutely brilliant. He predicted turns and events long before they happened. And he was always in control. Noone ever knew where his loyality lay because he was always playing on his own team instead of on one of the big houses'. Which is why he is the only character who was always in control of what he was doing, especially since the moment when he helped Sansa to escape Kingslanding. 

He married her aunt, then killed her, defending Sansa, and earning her trust, just to sell her off to Ramsay. And I am sure that he knew what kind of person Ramsey was. I am actually quite certain that Littlefinger gave Sansa to Ramsey simply for the reason that he will mistreat her so badly, that she will have enough anger to re-take Winterfell with Littlefinger on his side, which is excactly what happened. Yes, this was an evil plan and his interest in Sansa is really pedophile, but he knows how the world works and I wouldn't be suprised if he still had a long way up.

And some characters I understood better now

I feel like now I understand the relationship between Cercei and Jaime and especially Jaime as a person a lot better. I always admired their relationship, not for the incest of course, but for their unconditional love and their stability which is a rare thing on Game of Thrones. But only now, that I re-watched the show, I understood that their relationship is not balanced at all. Jaime loves Cercei with all he has. She is the only woman he every loved, both emotionally and physically. And he says again and again that she is the only one who matters to him. Like, the only one. Not even his kids matter. Only Cercei.

Cercei on the other hand doesn't love quite as unconditionally. She has affairs with other men. She also repeatedly pushes Jaime away and even sends him away from Kingslanding several times. For her what matters are her children, then power, and then Jaime. Which is a huge difference to the love Jaime is giving her, and I'm sure that this will create a conflict soon.

But Jaime sill loves her. Which also makes a bit more sense of the awful scene in season 4 we all ignore. I hate this scene because 1. it's not in the books and 2. it's totally out of character for Jaime. Or so I thought. Now, that I watched the rape scene again, I realized that it's not so senseless at all. Because right before it happens, Jaime says "Why do the Gods make me love a hateful woman?" which sums up his dilemma with Cercei. She wants power and she's evil (which Jaime in his core is not) but he loves her nevertheless. And this kind of love is dangerously close to obsession. The development of Jaime and Cercei's relationship is one of the plots I am most looking forward to in season 7 because yes, Jaime does love her a lot, but we have also seen that he betrayed her once before to free Tyrion in season 4, so he's not entirely loyal.

Montag, 14. November 2016

Stop being a grumpy asshole and have a good laugh #3

When life gives you lemons, ignore them and look at funny memes instead, preferably this Game of Thrones edition.

Contains Spoilers if you're not up to date with the show.

Freitag, 4. November 2016

100th post: Writing was my first love

I can't believe it, but this is my 100th post on this blog. It seeems so much because I honestly remember every single one of them really well. So, for this post anniversary, I want to write a bit about my first big love in life, which was writing. Writing has been an important part of my life for as long as I know how to write. Here's how it all began and how I got were I am today.

As soon as I learned how to write, I already wrote short stories. They were cute, but ridicolous, childish stories. I am pretty sure that my very first story was called "The monster in the alley" and that in end the moster of course collapsed into a million pieces.

When I was ten, we wrote short stories in school. I remember that one time we had to continue a story where the first sentence was given to us by the teacher. I wrote an awesome story about a dystopian society, a prison, a radical group of fighters and a man who once belonged to them and now challenged their leader to fight for death. My teacher love it. Little did he know that I stole it from the movie "Postman". Usually I didn't steal my stories, but they were greatly influenced by the books I read and the movies I watched.

When I was eleven, we learned how to write newspaper articles in school. It was so much fun and my teacher even told my Mum that I was talented and should become a journalist. Ever since then journalism was my one aim in life. I thought I new excactly what I wanted to do and I did everything to get closer to this, including numerous internships at newspapers and magazines and later freelance work.

From then on all I wrote where articles. As a teenager about celebrities and fashion and movies and books. Later about politics and society. To write fiction or other literary texts didn't even cross my mind. I even read very little.

Only around eight years later, when I was 19 and had taken a semester off my studies, did I once again start writing fiction. I decided to write a story for my friend, a hymn to our friendship, but also a love story with a tiny bit of fantasy. After that I now and then wrote several other stories, during my semester off, during my semester abroad in the US and when I was back at my studies.

I have a weird relationship to writing. On one hand I absolutely love it, it's my way of expressing my creativity and it's pretty much vital for me. I write every day, sometimes in my diary, sometimes blogposts, sometimes fiction. Writing is my outlet and in many ways I would go crazy without it.

On the other hand I don't really enjoy the process of writing. Actually, while I'm writing, especially when I'm writing fiction, I suffer, I feel like I just put down useless words on a page. But what I do enjoy (a lot!) is to read what I have written. Usually it turns out not as bad as I thought while writing it. I love having written something, seeing my words on the screen or on the paper. It's one of the most satisfying feelings I now. I also like revising and observing how my text becomes better.

One year ago, in fall 2015, when I was 24, I found an old exposé on my computer, a High School story, and I thought to myself, this is actually pretty interesting, I should work on this. Just then my university offered a class called Work in Progress where you work on a novel, so I took it. I started writing a youth novel which was loosly based on my old exposé, but I changed a lot, made the center of the story something different, changed the plot, and cut out tons of characters. In the writing class I presented my texts and got feedback from my peers and my teacher. I was so nervous but in the end my writing improved a lot through it and it helped me so much to share my writing with others. Even more now did I believe in my story and wanted to continue, hoping that one day it might turn into a book.

I am still working on this book now. I am five chapters in. I have again and again modified the plot but I still believe in the story. My university doesn't offer the writing class anymore, so I have started my own writing group with some other students, and every other week we meet and read out our texts to each other and give feedback. It's fun and most of all it's extremely motivating. My writing has changed a lot. I don't write whatever comes to my mind anymore, but I follow a plan and I try to uphold my writing voice which I have painfully discovered or rather created over the last year. I like working on one big project, writing a novel, and I love sharing my work. For me sharing my work is what really makes it worthwile.

As my blog was born out of this passion for writing too, and in honor of NaNoWriMo, I hope my story inspires you to pusue your passion, whatever it may be. When I was younger, all I wanted was a job where I write, but now I don't even care anymore. I just want to write in my freetime, at best every single day.