Before I started this blog, I was already blogging on Buzznet which was back in its day an awesome community of bloggers where I met many inspiring people and where celebrities and common people were treated the same. It was my blogging home for many years, but then more and more bloggers left the community and it recently shut down completely. This is why, one year ago, I started "And then everything changed" and it was a great decision!
For me, starting this blog was a huge step. For the first time I had no warm community to support me and shield me from the harsh internet world but I had to make it on my own. I soon found new communities, above all The Indie Chicks, a fabolous online magazine I wrote for, which unfortunately no longer exists, but the Badass Writers Group is still standing strong. I discovered many new, inspiring and sometimes even life-changing blogs and I was swallowed up in the world of (mostly female) bloggers who encoure each other to be badass women. I've enjoyed every moment of creating this blog so far and I hope that many more years of blogging will follow.
When I started this blog in March 2015 I was just about to start a new job at a publishing house, too. This was my first big girl job and I've held it for one year now. I felt so unprepared and overwhelmed in the beginning and to be honest I still feel like that now and then. Last week I attended a major book fair where I organized and held two erotic shows and six readings and let me tell you, huge events like that still make me just as nervous as if it was my first day. Which it is not. Despite my nervouseness, I can see that I have learned a lot during the past year and that I can handle my work better and that most of the time I actually know what I'm doing. Which doesn't keep me from freaking out, now and then. But I think that's just natural. We all fail sometimes, we are scared and insecure. I am turning 25 this year and adulthood often seems like a never ending uphill battle. This is what my blog is all about.
But if I think about the person I was a year ago, I can see that I have changed. Even if I still fall apart from time to time, I am much more stable now, I'm more confident, stronger - or at least I can see it more clearly now than a year ago. Both through this blog as well as through my job, I have developed into stronger version of me.
A lot has changed during the last year, but one thing which remained stable is my relationship. I've been with my boyfriend for more than four years now and thorugh all the storms, the battles, the rollercoaster rides he was the one who kept me grounded. No matter how crazy chaotic my day was, when I come home to him at night, really nothing else matters. I think it's important to have something or someone constant in your life. May it be your boyfriend, your sibling, your best friend, your mother, your favorite book, your passion for skateboarding, or your dog. Life can be extremely brutal sometimes but there's a lot of good in it and it's the good that really matters in the end. The hours you spent working or worrying, your salary, your number of followers - all this stuff means nothing, if you don't laugh and smile and spend your time with the people you love.
Here's to one more fabolous blog-year!